SecretAgentMan's Dossier

Useless Blog News

So far the blog's had 82,359 views and 61,091 visits since I started it in July of last year. (Don't let the November 2002 archive link fool you. That was I. Shawn McElhinney trying to pester me into blogging. That'll teach him!). In case anyone's wondering, a "view" is when someone Googling for "Papacy + Nuclear War + Frijoles" ends up here for 3 seconds before he flees in terror. A "visit" happens when someone ends up here by Googling for "Papacy + Nuclear War + Frijoles" and takes a long bathroom break before fleeing in terror.

Most of our visitors are independent, surfing in from a home or network connection. No more than 6% of our visitors have come here from an educational establishment, which is perhaps a good thing. If lots of my visitors are coming from American colleges and universities, I'm either writing twaddle or the New Springtime's closer than Ratzinger says it is.

The majority of you (40%) come from the east coast, with the Midwest U.S. coming in second at 25%, followed by California (15%+), and the central plains states (5%). (In my mind, the "Midwest" is bordered by the Great Lakes, and the Allegheny, Mississippi, and Ohio Rivers. The "central plains," or "plains states" are bordered by Canada, the Mississippi, the Rockies, and a line that runs across the northern boundaries of New Mexico and Texas, then down the southern border of Oklahoma, then back up north along Arkansas' western border and then east along it's northern border to the Mississippi. That's how I see it, and so I'm calling it).

The rest of our visitors hail, in order, from the UK; a meridian that covers Australia/Singapore/Indonesia; a meridian that runs through Bangladesh, China, Mongolia, and Russia; and another meridian that goes through west Africa, Italy, Germany/Poland, Sweden and Norway.

Some guy named Wayne Hurlburt has bought, and then sold, all my traded "blogshares" stock. I don't know who he sold them to, but I do know somebody ought to have a long, serious talk with him about his family's financial future. An outgoing link from my site is worth $565.74 in fake blogshares money, and the site itself is worth $12,912.60 in equally-fake blogshares money. I don't know what that means, either, except I still can't make any money at this. My wife will be pleased. She told me so when I started.

Lastly, there are now 89 subscribers to the Bloglet update system. That means if I started charging $1,000.00 a year for subscriptions, I could make some good bucks at this and quit my day job. Problem is, I'd get paid with fake blogshares money that isn't worth anything except the kind of ephemeral satisfaction you get by predicting which parking spot will be taken the next time you go around the block. You can't live on that. I know. I checked with my wife.

I think the only thing I'll be able to get to in the near future is a longish post about why I don't think anyone ought to vote for John Kerry. Voting for The Shrub is up for grabs. I may or may not give him my chad. But Kerry? Can't do it, folks, we just can't.